iPhone Headphones May Kill The Joy of Sex and Cause Sterility. Bug or Feature?
iPhone users rocking out to their favorite tunes may damage more than their hearing, if new research published by Greenpeace has any basis in fact. The report claims that iPhone’s included headphones contain dangerous levels of toxic chemicals that may be harmful to reproductive organs, or “happy zone” for you boys and girls under the age of twelve.
Senior Scientist at Greenpeace Research Laboratories, Dr. David Santillo, says… “Two of the phthalate plasticisers found at high levels in the headphone cable are classified in Europe as ‘toxic to reproduction, category 2′ because of their long-recognised ability to interfere with sexual development in mammals. While they are not prohibited in mobile phones, these phthalates are banned from use in all toys or childcare articles sold in Europe. Apple should eliminate the use of these chemicals from its products range.”.
Well, I’m convinced. If a left-wing extremist group conducted this research, it MUST be true. Just kidding, Greenpeace, I love you nutjobs. Read the rest of the report and scare the hell out of yourself. Oh, and if you’re married and trying to start a family, I’d start shopping for a pair of headphones. Uh huh.
First lead painted children’s toys, now this. Could this be part of a Chinese Communist plot to destroy western civilization by stifling our ability to reproduce? I think so.
October 15th, 2007 at 12:44 pm
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October 15th, 2007 at 2:03 pm
whew, glad i already procreated.
October 16th, 2007 at 2:29 am
You really scared me there! Luckily i already have two of ‘em little rascals. Wait…i still don’t have an iPhone yet. Hey honey…
October 16th, 2007 at 2:33 pm
i dont get it
October 17th, 2007 at 4:56 pm
[...] dolphins or saving single-cell organisms? Today the colorful Neo-Nazi activist organization made good on its promise to sue Apple over toxic materials found in iPhone, and further seeks block the [...]
October 28th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
SO let me get this straight ….if I don’t use “the headphone cable” thiers nothing wrong? Lucky I ordered a extention cable so I could use my own headphones….hahaha Sorry Greeny Peace…..GET A LIFE!!!
March 18th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
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